But for me, there were two main highlights last night, and no we are not talking about John Terry trying to give Alexis Sanchez some bum love, or the mis-kick from Torres which led to the final goal. For me, the two blokes who put in a real cracking performance were none other than Geoff Shreeves and Gary Neville! First off, you have to take your hat off to Gary Neville for his uncanny performance of Chris Kamara having an orgasm when Torres netted in the 90th! What was he thinking? Unbelievable!
Oh Gary, I bet Andy Gray is turning in his TalkSport grave watching that piece of camp commentary. But not to be outdone, good old "well done" Geoff Shreeves goes and trumps him by crushing a man's dreams live on TV! You couldn't make it up. Poor old Branislav Ivanovic is trying to enjoy his good times, and Geoff cuts him down like a bad habit!
Geoff was on fire! Later on in the programme he interviewed John Terry about his red card and the fact he'll miss the final as well, and then he goes and reminds JT about that penalty miss in Moscow! Geoff and Gary - I friggin' salute you! Roll on the final - I can't to see what they do next!
Jack Chatham is a fictional character from Steven Scaffardi's comedy novel The Drought.