Wednesday, 28 September 2011

My first sexual offer as a comedian – even if I was third in line!

Laugh them into bed
Diary of a stand-up comedian Entry #36
Jack Whitehall recently said in a magazine interview that he got into comedy to get laid. Personally, I can’t say that is the reason I got into comedy. Mainly because I have a girlfriend and she might read this. But there is nothing wrong with knowing that you’ve still got it!

I’d heard many a comedian say they did comedy to win over the ladies. It’s like the old saying - you can laugh the ladies into bed.

So you can imagine my frustration after nine months of working the open mic circuit, I have not had a friggin’ sniff! Nothing. Not even a friendly smile. I have even purposely avoided gigs where Guy Manners is doing stand-up to increase my chances of being the best looking male comic on that night!

But that all changed yesterday evening down at The Bowery as one audience member said she was bang up for sleeping with me!

Granted she had already made a beeline for Alex Chapman who looked none too impressed by her advances, before she moved on and invited Mr iPhone 4 Gatis Kandis to join her and Alex in a threesome.

If we’re telling the truth I was pretty much an afterthought as she only really brought me into the equation when prompted by one of the other acts to who else she wanted to sleep with in the room, and she casually pointed me out as “the one in the waistcoat can join in too if he wants.”

Obviously I was none too pleased about this and I let her know exactly how I felt with my response: “I’m in my 30’s so I take what I can get these days.”

But as MC Stu Privett had pointed out earlier in the night, she looked like the type of girl that would rip you a new one! So at the end of the night I legged it, with Alex and Gatis not too far behind! We're pathetic.

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