The Top 10 Best World Cup 2014 Adverts!

Stop everything... The World Cup has arrived!
And this is not just any old World Cup, this is a World Cup in Brazil. Yep, the English might have created the game of Association Football, but it was the Brazilian's who made it beautiful! It's time to forget South Africa and samba the night away!

But before things officially kick-off this evening with Brazil vs Croatia, that well-slicked marketing machine has already been charging across the globe to that delightful samba beat. And seeing as my day job means I have to take in a bit of advertising from time to time, a few corkers have been flying around the office today! Check them out...

1. McDonald`s GOL! FIFA World Cup Brasil 2014 



2. Nike Football: The Last Game



3. The Sun's World Cup Advert - #DoUsProud



4. 2014 FIFA World Cup on ESPN -- Ian Darke Calls a Date



5. Nike Football: Winner Stays



6. Beats by Dre - The Game Before The Game



7. Adidas Commercial 2014 : House Match



8. Adriana Lima - KIA World Cup 2014 TV Commercial Ads


9. Hyundai Because Fútbol - "Avoidance"



10. Cristiano Ronaldo and Pele commercial for Fly Emirates and FIFA World Cup 2014 

Lad Lit Book Reviews: I Am Zlatan Ibrahimović

If Zlatan Ibrahimović could sum up his book in one word, I’m pretty sure he would call it awesome. After all, this is the word that Zlatan refers to himself as on no fewer than 104 times within the first three pages! And if I’m completely honest, I tend to agree!

This is much more than a football autobiography. Of course it charts his incredible footballing journey from Swedish outfit Malmö to the dizzy heights of European giants Ajax, Juventus, Inter, Barcelona, AC Milan and Paris St Germain, but the heart of this story is that of a poor child of immigrant parents.

Growing up on the tough streets of Rosengard, Zlatan paints a fairly bleak childhood in terms of poverty, where stealing bikes was seen as nothing more than an everyday pastime and imitating a police officer with a shampoo bottle to pull someone over (yes, he actually did this!) was merely just a bit of fun. Caught in between a bitter divorce between his Bosnian Muslim father and his Croatian Catholic mother, it was Zlatan’s talent as a football player that shone through and would act as he escape mechanism to a world that was totally out of reach for people on the estate in which he lived.

While other youngsters played football to the strict no-nonsense Swedish approach, Zlatan was more concerned with imitating his Brazilian heroes who’s videos he would study to perfect their wonderfully crafted samba skills. Even when parents at the local football club where Zlatan played started a petition to rid Zlatan and his selfish exploits on the football pitch, he was undeterred in his approach to the beautiful game.

It is a stubbornness and confrontational attitude that would serve Zlatan well throughout his career, if not making the odd enemy along the way. In the very first chapter of the book Zlatan accuses legendary Barcelona coach Pep Guardiola of being a ‘creepy control freak’ and later on as a man who was afraid of Jose Mourinho with ‘no balls’. That pretty much sets the tone for the rest of the book that pulls no punches.

Sandwiched in the middle of all of this are those wonderfully classic Zlatan moments of magic, mayhem and mastery on and off the football field. When a young Zlatan was informed that Southampton was interested in acquiring his services he bluntly responded with: “What the fuck! Southampton! Is that my level?” Or his poetic comparison of playing for two of the modern games greatest managers: “If Mourinho lights up a room, Guardiola draws the curtains.” And of course the modest Zlatan quotes that range from “We won the UEFA Supercup, I was awesome” to “An injured Zlatan is a properly serious thing for any team.”

But just like that other sporting great Muhammad Ali, who set the standard for could talking the talk and walking the walk, Zlatan backs up all of his bravado by delivering the goods. After all, here is a man who has won league titles at every club he has played at, including an eight-year winning streak that took in championships in Holland, Spain and Italy. So when this man tells you that “What John Carew does with a football, I can do with an orange” you tend to listen.

It is fair to say that I Am Zlatan Ibrahimović will whet the appetite of every football fan as it not only details a great story of an underdog rising to the very top, but it intrigues with tales and insight of some of the game’s greatest names. Added to the mix his youth and background makes for one of the best – if not the best – football biography I’ve ever read.

If I was asked to sum this autobiography  up in one word, I’d literally take a leaf out of Zlatan’s book and call it awesome.

My top 10 favourite The Wonder Years facts you might not know to celebrate the DVD release!

This week marks one of the greatest weeks in TV history! And I'm not talking about the fact that yet another Hollyoaks girl got naked in Games of Thrones last night (although that is and always will be worthy of a special mention...). But this is much bigger than that! You can forget the On Demand revolution and internet streaming because it is time to celebrate a good old fashioned DVD release! The Wonder Years has finally been given the long-awaited nod to be made available to the public to own forever!

Fred Savage made the announcement this week when he Tweeted "#WonderYearsDVD coming soon" with an accompanying image of the whole cast back together, and as if I didn't damn right nearly pee myself in a state of nostalgic heaven!

The Wonder Years is the greatest coming-of-age story ever told, and if you grew up in the late 80s and early 90s then you will in no doubt be in agreement that this TV show is up there with the best of them! It was a huge influence on me, including my writing and there are influences in The Drought for sure which will hopefully be recognizable to anyone who has read the book.

You can keep up to date with details about the DVD release at wonderyearsdvds.com but before you do please check out my very own mini celebration with a trip down memory lane with my Top 10 favourite facts about The Wonder Years that you might not know. Ah, the memories. Enjoy!

10. Does anyone know where The Wonder Years was set?
In a word, no! It was never really mentioned in the show where the Arnold family actually lived. According to Wikipedia, the show’s husband and wife co-creators Neal Marlens and Carol, Black based a lot of the stories on their own childhood memories from growing up in Huntington, Long Island (New York) and White Oak, Silver Spring (Maryland) respectively. But TV network ABC wanted the location to be the non-specific suburb of Anywhere, USA, to appeal to a wider audience. Some fans have pointed to the fact that the family car had a Californian licence plate number in one episode, while others say New York because of the New York Jets jacket Kevin religiously wore in the first couple of seasons.The actual house used for exterior shots was at 516 University Ave., Burbank, California.

9. The Wonder Years won an Emmy after only six episodes
Today our favorite shows seem to churn out an endless number of episodes per series (I mean seriously, does anyone care anymore how he met his mother?!). But The Wonder Years needed only six episodes to pick up the Emmy award for Best Comedy Series in 1988 and Fred Savage became the youngest actor at 13 to be nominated for the Best Leading Actor for a Comedy Series. In all, the show received a total of 70 nominations for various awards and won 24 of those including gongs for the outstanding series soundtrack, which incidentally is one of the main reasons why it has taken so long for the show to be released on DVD due to the sensitive issue rights of all the tracks used in the show.

8. Becky Slater and Winner Cooper are sisters
That's right, Kevin Arnold's nemesis and significant other (fans of Season 2, Episode 11 will get that nerdy reference I have just made...) are sisters! Not in the show obviously, but in real life. In fact, Danica McKellar who played Winnie Cooper actually had some competition from her younger sibling, Crystal, to land the main role of Kevin's young love. Even casting director Mary Buck admitted that "it was practically a tossup" as to who got the role, but in the end Danica got the nod and would even go up against her real-life sister for Kevin affections as Crystal McKellar played part of Becky Slater in 11 episodes. Perhaps one of the reasons that influenced the whole Becky Slater story had to do with the fact during the filming of the show, Danica McKellar had a growth spurt which resulted in her looking ridiculous standing next to the 4-foot-10 Fred Savage and forced the writers to write Winnie in as a background character for a short period to allow Kevin's height to catch up with her!

7. Imagine if Kevin had a touch of The Sopranos about him...
Fred Savage has built out a decent career for himself as a director and producer (he has directed shows such as 2 Broke Girls and Modern Family), but back when he was a fresh-faced actor it was another TV great in the making who nearly had the chance to shape and mould the direction of one Kevin Arnold. In an attempt to make the show more edgier, ABC asked David Chase (who would go on to create The Sopranos) to write them a script. Chase proposed an episode where Kevin ends up acting like Holden Caulfield after reading Catcher in the Rye and starts drinking coffee and smoking, but it was rejected in favour of keeping with the wholesome image of the show intact.

6. Paul Pfeiffer is NOT Marilyn Manson!
For a period of time a rumour spread like wildfire that actor Josh Saviano was indeed shock rocker Marilyn Manson. Of course this was ridiculous as Paul and Winnie getting together (nerds please see episode "She, My Friend and I"). In fact, Saviano, who played Kevin's geeky sidekick Paul, turned his back on acting and the entertainment world all together after the show and studied at Yale before becoming a successful New York lawyer (which was almost on the money to what happened to Paul as it was revealed in the final episode that he went to Harvard and became a lawyer). And for the record, Marilyn Manson's real name is Brain Warner. Yeah, doesn't really have the right ring to it huh?

5. The Wonder Years was a playground for future famous stars
Despite the fact that Paul Pfeiffer did not go on to become an Antichrist Superstar and don red lipstick and eye liner, there were plenty of other actors who appeared in The Wonder Years and went on to become familiar faces in their own right. Here is a few names you might recognise who all had roles alongside Kevin Arnold and co: John Corbett (Sex and the City, My Big Fat Greek Wedding), Mark-Paul Gosselaar (Saved by the Bell), Breckin Meyer (Road Trip, Garfield), Dustin Diamond (Saved by the Bell), Juliette Lewis (Natural Born Killers), David Schwimmer (Friends), Alicia Silverstone (Clueless), Jim Caviezel (The Passion of Christ), Giovanni Ribisi (Friends, Saving Private Ryan), Seth Green (Family Guy, Austin Powers) and Robin Thicke (plonker who cheated on Paula Patton - what were you thinking man?!).

4. And that Home Alone guy was the voice of older Kevin!
That's right, believe it or not, Daniel Stern - who played the hapless crook alongside Joe Pesci trying to outwit Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone - was indeed the inner voice and thoughts of Kevin Arnold. Stern also directed a number of episodes of The Wonder Years and appeared alongside Fred Savage in the movie Little Monsters before he went on to encounter another little monster in Kevin McCallister. And here is another little nugget for ya - Daniel Stern was not originally penned in as the narrator. Actor Arye Gross was used in the pilot episode, before the producers had a last-minute change of heart and re-recorded with Stern. And if that isn't enough Stern trivia for you, it was actually the voice of Stern's real-life son in the final narration of the final episode!

3. Winnie Cooper is hot
Like many a young teenage boy, I had a crush on Winnie Cooper (including Fred Savage who said he was "in love with her for the same reasons every other boy fell in love with her" before their relationship became one more of a sibling type bond and all he wanted to do was "irritate her.") But I digress... So it is nice to know that had my completely unrealistic fantasy as a 13-year-old boy that I would one day and meet and marry Winnie had come true, I would have been a very lucky man! And just in case you find this section of the top 10 isn't lowbrow and perhaps a tad sexist, another Danica McKellar fact is that she has a degree in mathematics and is a best-selling author. Hot and smart, the perfect combination!



2. Was Jason a bad an influence on Fred as Wayne was on Kevin?
Jason Hervey's character Wayne Arnold was notorious for terrorizing and generally setting a bad example for Kevin (so much so that the 'Wayne Arnold' character was ranked #7 in TV Guide's list of "TV's 10 Biggest Brats" in 2005), and during the filming of the sixth and final series, it was alleged that some of that bad behaviour had spilled over into real life when a costume designer on the show named Monique Long filed a sexual harassment charge against the stars. The case was eventually settled out of court but it brought a lot of unwanted publicity, and according to uproxx.com created a number of rumours that were completely false. Savage called the whole incident "a terrible experience." As for Jason Hervey, it wasn't always easy playing the bad older brother especially when some fans couldn't separate the fiction from reality, which resulted in someone once punching him in the face in a bar and telling him "I used to have a brother like you!"

1. Kevin Arnold kissed a porn star
Throughout the six seasons of The Wonder Years Kevin had his fair share of TV romances. Despite the fact Winnie was the main object of his desires pretty much throughout the whole series, he still managed to keep himself fairly busy with the opposite sex. Who could forget Denise the Grease, or Inga the Swedish exchange student, or the new girl Madeline Adams, or even Miss White (especially Miss White!). But the most infamous of all Kevin's ex-flames has to be his holiday romance Terri from season 3. And it wasn't necessarily that a 13-year-old Kevin lies to a 15-year-old Terri about his age that was controversial, more to do with the fact that the actress who played her, Holly Sampson, went on became a porn star as in such movie greats as Cheating Housewives 6. And if that wasn't enough, the actress was also linked to Tiger Woods during his cheating scandal! You can find out more about Kevin's love interests here.

The top 10 reasons why you SHOULDN'T wear Google Glass

There is no doubt that those smart cookies over at Google are revolutionising the digital tech space at the moment and quickly taking over the world in the process. Take Google Glass for example, one of their most exciting developments this year. The wearable computer eye-wear is a look into the future (yes, the pun was intentional) and makes films like Total Recall seem like they could become reality, which is pretty cool seeing as I'm a firm supporter of more triple-breasted women in the office.

Yep, tech geeks are taking over the world alright. Remember that nerd you used to sit next to in class? Chances are you are working for that kid now. But the good news for all us half-wits who could only dream of creating something as remarkable as Google Glass is what those nerds have in brains they still lack in style. But that is all set to change as Google Glass announced a couple of months ago that there were working with Ray Ban and Oakley to address that situation.

But before they do, let us take this chance to laugh at those tech geeks one last time with the top 10 reasons why you SHOULDN'T wear Google Glass:

10. You will look like an asshole
It can't be helped. If you walk down the high street wearing these, you deserve to be judged.

9. Seriously, who really wants to look like this?
Let's face it, would you rather be Han Solo or Geordi La Forge?

8. Okay, Trekkies want to look like this...
... but that certainly does not make it right!

7. But Harry Potter wears glasses and he's cool!
Yes, but who got to shag Hermione? That's right Ron. She chose a ginger over glasses.

6. Google Glass can help with things like breastfeeding
I don't know why and I don't care. This picture is just weird.

5. You are leaving yourself open to attacks
Friday night, 12 beers later... you know it will happen!

4. You think it looks bad now...
...imagine what will happen when they start bringing out accessories!

3. No matter what Ray Ban or Oakley bring to the table...
...you will never look as cool as Arnie in The Terminator

2. In fact, you won't look cool period!
Nope, the best you can hope for is looking like this guy and who the hell wants that?!

1. Google Glass has banned porn
So it kinda begs the question what is the point if you can't look at naked chicks on the move?!

The Top 10 Ultimate Warrior moments, matches and memories!

With the sad news of the Ultimate Warrior's passing last week, it got me thinking about all the wonderful memories I have of one of my greatest childhood heroes. The Warrior even got a mention during a speech from my father on my wedding day such was the lengths I went to idolize the WWE legend when I was a youngster. Heck, who am I kidding - after the right amount of alcohol, even today I have been known to splash on the face paint and strip down to my underpants and salute the man!

Too much information? With that being said, perhaps it's best I skip straight to my top 10 Ultimate Warrior moments, matches and memories!

10. Induction into the Hall of Fame
Arguably this one should be a lot higher in the list, but I personally think it’s the perfect place to start to prelude everything that made the Warrior the legend he became. He could have used the platform to have one final dig at the WWE for the bad blood that had gone on between the two in the passing years, but instead he was gracious in his thanks to Linda and Vince McMahon. But perhaps the most memorable part of the whole induction was his first appearance since 1996 on Monday Night Raw two days later. It was vintage Warrior, or Wawr-yer as he would say, but at the same time extremely poignant with what would develop just a day later. In what must now viewed as an extremely emotional speech the Warrior declared the WWE fans were the ‘legend makers of the Ultimate Warrior’. With the tragedy that would strike less than 24 hours later it is this part of that speech that stands out the most: ‘Every man's heart one day beats its final beat, his lungs breathe their final breath. And if what that man did in his life makes the blood pulse through the body of others, and makes them bleed deeper, than something larger than life, then his essence, his spirit, will be immortalized by the storytellers, by the loyalty, by the memory of those who honor him and make the running the man did live forever.’

9. The ultimate package
If, like me, you were a kid growing up in the late 80s and early 90s, the best possible wrestling fix you could hope for in the UK would be a balding obese guy called Shirley Crabtree belly-flopping someone who looked like they had just been plucked out of the local Weatherspoons. So you can imagine just how awe-struck I was as a 10-year-old the first time I struck eyes on this growling, face-painted long haired beast from parts unknown, storm to the ring with a physique that looked like it had been chiselled by the Greek God’s as ring music reminiscent to Eye of the Tiger blasted out across the arena to a thunderous ovation. In a sport that had been previously dominated by one man, here was a guy who didn’t preach that we had to say our prayers and eat our vitamins. Instead, here was a guy who spouted off gems such as ‘Load up the spaceship with the rocket fuel!’ and invited us to ‘Come on in where nightmares are the best part of my day!” A few years ago the WWE released a DVD called The Self-Destruction of The Ultimate Warrior which was basically Vince McMahon’s opportunity to take a cheap shot at a man who he was clearly at odds with. The likes of Chris Jericho and Triple H mocked the Warrior’s nonsensical promo’s but as a kid growing up during that nostalgic era of the WWF (that’s right, I said WWF – none of this WWE nonsense. Proper wrasslin’!), no one came close to the power, mystique, intensity and damn-straight craziness of The Ultimate Warrior!

8. The Warrior destroys Triple H at Wrestlemania XII
In what would be one of a number of Ultimate Warrior ring-returns, this one probably stands out for all the wrong reasons! After yet another reconciliation between the Warrior and Vince McMahon, this match saw the return of the Warrior with what was no-doubt planned as a high-impact comeback as Triple H – the future COO of the company – was squashed in less than 2 minutes. But the part that undoubtably left the most sour of tastes in Triple H’s mouth was having the Warrior completely no-sell his trademark finisher The Pedigree. Alas, this would be the Warrior’s final foray with the WWE prior to his Hall of Fame induction as he would later leave the WWE under another cloud and we would not see him again until…

7. It’s all smoke and mirrors in the WCW

I turned 20 in 1998 and just about every wrestling hero I had as a teenager seemed to be plying their trade in WCW at the time. It was like a massive retro-themed wrestling amusement park and it should have been amazing. The notion of Hulk Hogan being a bad guy was still a novelty that was hard to fathom for all the little Hulkamaniac’s and the scene was set in 1998 for arguably the most iconic wrestling collision to happen all over again when the Warrior turned up in WCW. It all started with so much promise, but the fact Warrior had pretty much been given carte blanche to do so as he pleased with his character, and Hogan was seemingly only interested in an ego-boosting victory over one of the few men to have pinned him cleanly meant that this was just another example of a wasted opportunity for the now defunct WCW. 

6. The real Royal Rumble super posedown

Many will remember the Super Posedown at Royal Rumble 89 that kick-started the memorable feud between Ravishing Rick Rude and the Ultimate Warrior, but that has nothing on the posedown that came one year later when two of the biggest babyfaces in the company would come face-to-face in the briefest of moments that would change sports entertainment forever. Hulk Hogan was the untouchable force in the WWE that had ruled the sport for the best part of a decade beating giants and macho men along the way. But no one was prepared for what was about to follow as Hogan and Warrior cleared the ring until only the two of them remained in the every man for himself contest. Every single fan held their breath as their two heroes locked eyes on each other for the first time. Neither man budged as they met in the centre of the ring and as one simple double clothesline floored them both, we as fans were already hooked on to the life-support of wrestling at the prospect that these two gladiators might, just might, face each other in the ring for real one day.

5. ‘I said I’d wrestle anyone, I didn’t say I’d wrestle a warrior!’

In what was a career-defining moment for the character building of the Ultimate Warrior, his match against the Honky Tonk Man at Summerslam 88 will live long in the memory. The Honky Tonk Man had annoyingly held on to the Intercontinental Title for a record-breaking 18-months; somehow escaping defeat after defeat via the backdoor. But when the arrogant Honky marched out to the ring and demanded an opponent stating he’d fight anyone, a wrestling icon was truly born. The moment that instantly recognizable guitar riff hit the speakers the crowd inside Madison Square Garden were on their feet as the Warrior stormed to the stage and took Honky apart in a mere 31-seconds to capture his first title. Everything about this squash worked perfectly from the stunned expression on Honky’s face, to the sheer brute force in which the Warrior took his opponent out with, to the comical after-match interview in which Honky bemoans ‘I said I’d wrestle anyone, I didn’t say I’d wrestle a warrior!’

4. Warrior returns at Wrestlemania VIII to rescue Hulk Hogan

This is a personal favourite of mine because it was one of those occasions when no matter how many people felt the need to tell me wrestling was ‘fake’ the sport still managed to grab me by the scruff of the neck and throttle me with so much excitement that I’m sure I actually peed in my pants! If you watched wrestling in the late 80s/early 90s you were in one of two camps – a Hulkamaniac or a Little Warrior. For those Little Warriors like me, there was a gap in our lives when the Warrior left the WWE in 1991. Sure we cheered for Hulk Hogan, but it wasn’t the same. So as Sid Justice and Papa Shango beat up on our replacement hero at the end of Wrestlemania VIII something incredible happened. The first beat of that unforgettable music reverberated around the arena. Surely it couldn’t be, could it? The second beat. No, it has to be a mistake. The third, the fourth, the fifth… and he’s back! In true Warrior style he came to the rescue of the Hulkster and the two of them shared a Wrestlemania ring for the second time in as many years and it was a truly beautiful sight. Now stop looking at me, I’ve got something in my eye…

3. The Warrior retires the Macho Man

It seems incredible to think that these two gladiators of the ring are sadly no longer with us. Of course for me it is a generational thing for me, but I think you would be hard-pressed to find a better story-line and feud than the one the Warrior and Randy Savage played out throughout the early 90s. It all started with Savage costing Warrior to lose his World Title to Sgt Slaughter at Royal Rumble 91 and culminated in one of the greatest matches in Wrestlemania history which cost Savage his career. In between, Savage went completely off the rails and separated from his long-term manager and main squeeze Miss Elizabeth, but after the gruelling match-up which saw the Warrior come back from five top-buckle elbows to beat the Macho Man with a one-footed pinfall, Savage was reunited Elizabeth and there wasn’t a dry eye in the house! Sasvage would eventually be re-instated and the two of them would do it all again in a great match-up at Wembley Stadium for Summerslam 92!

2. Warrior/Rick Rude feud and Summerslam 89 and 90 matches

It’s only when you start to write a list like this that you realise just how many great matches the Warrior was actually involved in. Of course, there is one match that clearly stands out in everyone’s mind but for me, the Warrior and Ravishing Rick Rude Summerslam duals in 1989 and 1990 were absolutely top drawer. This is a feud that raged for nearly two years taking in Royal Rumble’s and Wrestlemania’s along the way, before these two classic summer showdowns. The first would see the Warrior gain revenge for his Intercontinental title defeat at the hands of Rude (and literally the hands of Bobby Heenan) at Wrestlemania V as he regained the belt, before the two would clash again a year later, this time inside a steel cage for the world title. I’m not too sure which one I would say is the best match, but if I was hard pressed on the subject I would probably opt for Summerslam 89 down to no small part in the near hysterical state Tony Schiavone manages to warp himself into at the end of the match!

1. The Ultimate Challenge

It was hardly going to be anything else now was it! One of the most iconic images of wrestling in the early 90s, if not all-time, has to be that of the Ultimate Warrior’s silhouette standing in front of the huge in-ring firework display holding aloft the two WWE championship belts. After allowing us fans to dream the ultimate wrestling dream by giving us a taste at the Royal Rumble of what a Hulk Hogan vs Ultimate Warrior showdown might look like, that dream became a reality when it was announced that the Ultimate Challenge would take place at the SkyDome in Montreal, Canada at Wrestlemania VI. It was champion vs champion, title for title. Of course, Hulk Hogan would win – he always wins, but then something happened. The Hulkster didn’t win! It was like a torch had been passed as the two embraced at the end of what would be named Pro Wrestling Illustrated’s Match of the Year 1990. This match cemented the Warrior’s legacy and for that moment he was the main man in sports entertainment, and for many wrestling fans who remember that golden year like this Little Warrior, he still is and always will be.

John Terry photobombs the Oscars!

There is a very good chance that Chelsea will end up with some silverware this season, but that didn't stop that man John Terry making sure he got in on the action at Hollywood's biggest bash of the year. When host Ellen DeGeneres decided to take a selfie with some of the biggest stars at the awards ceremony, step forward the undisputed champion of the photobomb squeezing in next to Brad Pitt. JT take a bow son...

Top 10 reasons why Vince McMahon should buy Newcastle United

Rumours have been flying around on the internet today that billionaire WWE owner Vince McMahon is set to become the latest American to buy an English football club with Newcastle United firmly in his sights!

Just imagine how awesome it would be if Vince actually did decide to take that giant leap across the pond to dip his toe in Premier League waters. And there were Geordie fans thinking they had a circus on their hands with Mike Ashley in charge! If this happens then I want someone to tell me immediately as I'll be first in queue for a season ticket and here's why...

Top 10 Reasons Why Vince McMahon Should Buy Newcastle United

10. Controversial refereeing decisions would go through the roof
Whether you love them or loathe them, one of the biggest talking points in the boozer at 5.30pm on a Saturday are the refereeing decisions that have affected the game we love.

Imagine what would happen if you threw in the odd WWE official to rule over a game. They already wear the barcodes of Newcastle so surely it wouldn't be long until Vince had them in charge of all the games down at St James Park. And instead of missing clear-cut penalty shouts or poor offside decisions, we'd have referees knocked unconscious and missing goals or the odd ex player turning up as a special guest referee (Vinnie Jones anyone?!).

9. Newcastle already have their very own Diva's in place
The WWE has always been home some scantily clad women who cat-fight inside the squared circle for our entertainment and in those lasses from Geordie Shore Vince already had his very own ready-made Newcastle Diva's ready to tear things up.

Imagine the chaos that would ensue when these girls turn up and clash with the WAGs, especially after the latest tabloid sensation involving a married footballer and one of the Geordie Shore girls. That has the ultimate pillow fighting slumber match written all over it! That is Pay-Per-View gold in my book (that or late night soft porn)!

8. You need passionate fans
Newcastle fans have often been called the most passionate of football fans in all the land which is just as well because they'll need that to match the average WWE audience. Combine the topless beer-bellied fans of the Magpies with the banner waving wrestling junkie and you'll have a carnival atmosphere at St James Park every week.

And lets not forget WWE fans are a sucker for a great chant. What?! I said WWE fans are a sucker for a good chant. What?! Did you see what I did there? Of course you did!

7. Players would have to cut amazing promo interviews
In the modern age of wrestling the WWE superstars are judged not only on their grappling skills but also how good they are at cutting promo's. We pay good money Sky Sports and BT Sports to watch their coverage of the Premier League and we deserve more than a monotone Steven Gerrard going through the motions. We want effort damn it! Imagine Wayne Rooney bitch-slapping Geoff Shreeves, calling out Joey Barton, and then asking the fans if they can smell what Coleen is cooking!

6. Players could have their very own unique finishing moves
There is nothing quite like the excitement you feel when you know your favourite WWE superstar is about to pull out their signature move to finish the match, so why shouldn't footballers have a move to get the fans going?

We could have had the Steve Stone Stunner, or the Neil Ruddock Big Belly Splash, and Zinedine Zidane certainly would not have finished his career in shame if the People's Headbutt was something we'd been waiting to see!

5. Vince could run the Cockney Mafia out of town
There is nothing like a good feud in the WWE, and if there is one way to win over the Geordie fans then Vince could do a lot worse than start his tenure as the new Newcastle owner than feuding with the Cockney Mafia and sending them packing! And why not go the whole hog and bring back Degeneration X to get the job done?

4. Vince could go head to head with the other billionaire owners
Vince McMahon is no stranger to taking on the rich and powerful. In the 1990s he went head to head with media mogul Ted Turner when the WWE (then WWF) won the ratings war against arch rivals WCW, and more recently at Wrestlemania he took on Donald Trump in the ring. So Vince would have no problem dealing with football boardroom battles with the likes of Roman Abramovich or Sheikh Mansour. In fact, Mr McMahon would probably revel in pitting his wits against his billionaire foes and who wouldn't want to see the three of them battle it out in the main event of Money In The Bank! Throw in the odd Vincent Tan and tag teams like The Venky Brothers and you already have the perfect WWE circus in waiting.

3. Alan Shearer and the one handed salute could make a comeback
If Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair can still turn up in spandex and throw themselves around a wrestling ring at the combined age of 319 years old, then Alan Shearer can certainly don the black and white of the Toon one last time! Some of the greatest WWE storylines have been based on great comebacks and surely Vince would be able to create the greatest and most flamboyant comeback in football history. Imagine this - one minute Alan Shearer is sitting on the MoTD set watching his beloved Newcastle lose another game. The next thing he snaps and punches Robbie Savage, rips open his shirt to reveal the famous barcodes and sprints off towards St James Park where he runs on to the pitch and nods in the winner home against Sunderland in injury time. Now that's what you call a comeback!


2. Joe Kinnear would almost certainly turn-up as General Manager on Smackdown
You can't keep a good man down and when you have the sort of contacts that Joe Kinnear's got, then we would undoubtedly see the legend make a return. Granted it might not be a football stadium near you anytime soon, but this man would be a box office smash if he traded football for wrestling and turned up as the latest General Manager on Smackdown as the ultimate bad guy.

Think about it - the fans would hate him instantly, we'd have some great comical moments when he gets all of the wrestler's names wrong and RAW certainly wouldn't have to worry about him signing any of their talent! And the media have already given him the perfect wrestling name - Joe The Volcano!

1. Imagine the Newcastle team line-up! 
Forget Barcelona or Bayern Munich, this Newcastle First XI would strike fear into hearts of any team they faced. I'd like to see Cristiano Ronaldo complain after The Big Show has just clattered into him from behind! And they'd have to re-write the rule book with this lot as the professional foul turns into a suplex off the corner flag!