The Drought by Steven Scaffardi book review (taken from Bookaholic Confessions)

This book review was originally posted on Bookaholic Confessions on Friday, April 29, 2016 as part of the #LadLitBlogTour

4 Stars
When Dan Hilles breaks up with his long-term girlfriend something very odd seems to happen to him. He suddenly becomes tongue-tied around the opposite sex and appears unable to even strike up a (normal) conversation with a girl, let alone ask one out on a date… This results in Dan finding himself in what he refers to as a ‘Drought’. The longer the Drought goes on, the harder Dan tries to find himself a date, leading to some very awkward, unusual and down-right hilarious consequences. Why has it suddenly become so impossible for Dan to land himself a date? After all, he’s a ‘seven-out-of-ten’ kinda’ guy and his bunch of quirky yet loveable friends seem to have no trouble attracting the ladies. Will ‘The Drought’ ever end or is Dan destined to stay date-less for ever (gulp)?

‘Lad-Lit’ is a genre that I have grown to love over recent years. It seems to be something which is becoming more and more prominent and its unique-selling-point seems to be that it’s one of those rare types of novel which appeal to both men and women. I would class ‘lad-lit’ as Mike Dunn, Nick Spalding, Jon Rance (a selection of authors who I absolutely love!)…And I can now firmly add Steven Scaffardi to that list because if lad-lit is your thing then The Drought is a must-read. I think the main reason novels such as The Drought appeal to both male and female readers is because of two reasons. Firstly, for male readers, they will undoubtedly be able to relate to this story. It could be written about them and their group of friends. It’s funny, realistic and has a narrator talks total sense (to them at least…!) and is also incredibly likeable. From the female perspective, this novel is almost like an insight into the workings of the male mind. It’s amazing to read about the thoughts and ideas that run through Dan’s head (and it’s also extremely funny at times…And kind of scary, actually.)

Bearing in mind that this is a novel based around the lives of a group of four young men, there is the usual selection of banter, boobs and bottoms. Although I think you’d assume that this might be the case from the get-go so don’t be outraged if it’s not your cup of tea.

As a female reader I completely warmed to Dan. Ok, there might have been times when he did/said/believed the silliest of things but that’s all part of his charm. His heart is in the right place and I was totally on his side throughout. It was brilliant when he would do something seemingly innocent only for it to totally backfire on him. Your heart will go out to him whilst you’re quietly chuckling to yourself. Admittedly it’s usually his friends who get him into these cringe-worthy situations and for this reason they are a cracking set of characters. Their friendship group is both hilarious yet realistic and they certainly made me chortle when they got together. My favourite moments include their outing to Brighton (exotic dancers, anyone!?) and when Rob, Ollie and Jack individually coach Dan to get him ‘back in the game’; this involves overhauling his style, fitness levels and teaching him other, erm, things of vital importance. I liked Rob the best (You’ve got to love a guy who knows his fashion, am I right?) I also really liked the relationship between Dan and his work colleague, Kelly. They have great chemistry and I am SO pinching their game of ‘Office Dare’!

Lots of books are described as being ‘laugh-out-loud’ funny, but The Drought genuinely will have you sniggering. In fact, more than sniggering…Try a great, big, good old belly laugh. I love books like this – books that can completely take my mind off everything else and make me smile. This novel really was a brilliantly funny, well constructed, light, fun-filled read.

There are so many stories centred around dating from the female-perspective that it made a refreshing change to read a novel from a male point of view. Not necessarily one for the faint hearted, but if you’re a fan of humour and cheekiness then you’ll love Dan’s misadventures.

I personally am really looking forward to the follow-up, The Flood. I miss blundering-yet-loveable Dan and his coin-purse…

The Flood by Steven Scaffardi book review (taken from My Book File)

This book review was originally posted on My Book File on Sunday, March 6, 2016

4/5 Stars
Dan Hilles is ready to spice up his love life after eight months of drought. After spending the afternoon in the pub with his three best friends, he makes a bet. He has to date four women simultaneously in eight weeks, without them finding out about each other, just to prove a point. Dan is more than ready for the Flood to come his way. What could possibly go wrong?

I received a free copy from the author in exchange for an honest review.

“The text alert pierced my ear drums like someone has just plunged a needle into the side of my head. Blinking hard, my eyes momentarily struggled to recognise my own bedroom.”

Meet Dan Hilles. A great guy living in London, a nice guy… with a hangover and no idea what has happened, only to discover that during the night he somehow ended up in the same bed with two of his friends. From that point onwards it seems like the unimaginable happens to Dan. He gets his very own stalker, his new roommate is somewhat mental, he gets another chance with the girl who’s got away, he gets a chance to make the ultimate man-dream come true and he can make some money by winning a bet. But is anything ever easy when a woman is involved? And Dan has not just one but four women to worry about at the same time, because that is part of the bet. Will he pull it off or will he fall into a death-trap?

I confess that I was nearly dying of laughter most of the time while reading this book. First of all I think it’s great that this book gives mostly a man’s perspective of things but also a woman’s perspective on some occasions. Secondly I loved the use of language in this book. I can imagine that some people might find it a little to direct sometimes but I had no problem with that whatsoever and I loved the way Scaffardi put thing down in such a matter-of-fact-way that even the most bizarre events seem completely logical. Some of the stuff that happens to Dan seems so surreal but at the same time he and all that he goes through are so relatable. I mean let’s be honest we all have, or some of us are in fact, that somewhat unlucky friend. Here’s a small example of what I mean with the above:

“I carefully tried to navigate the phone out of my pocket without inappropriately touching any of the people who were cramped around me, but of course all I succeeded in doing was brushing my hand down the back of the bald guy in a completely unintentionally seductive way.”

This small passage comes from a scene where Dan is train. There are loads of people there and I guess that most of us have been in this situation once or twice (or maybe more often). It’s so relatable, I loved it, I really did. There are so many of these small things in life that have been put in this book, it’s just a great touch to the whole. Then there are the characters. The interaction between the characters are just great and the situations they get themselves into… well what can I say it’s just hilarious. What I liked about most characters is that they were well formed, they were not just portraying one sort emotion or any one-dimensional trait but they changed during the book. The minor characters are not just there either! Some of them are able to make a specific scene, like the bald guy in the train.

So in short:
I think this was great and I had fun reading it. Dan is a nice protagonist, the use of language suits the story and the characters will take you from one crazy situation into another. Overall I think it was just a great romance/comedy/chicklit kind of novel and I’m really looking forward to the next one, though I think that may take a while :’)

The Drought by Steven Scaffardi book review (taken from My Book File)

This book review was originally posted on My Book File on March 14, 2016. 

4/5 Stars 
Dan Hilles is just a normal guy with a job, a small group of friends and a long-term girlfriend, but not for long. Things start to change for Dan when he breaks-up with his girlfriend Stacey and he finds himself single again for the first time in three years. Unfortunately for him things don’t change in his favour and he enters a period of drought. With some near death experiences, more than a couple of awkward dates and some really embarrassing situations, things are getting real complicated. But Dan has a goal and he will not stop until he ends the drought.

I received a free copy from the author in exchange for an honest review.

“We sang it loud. We sang it proud. We sang it with passion. We sang it completely tone deaf. But it didn’t matter. It was the perfect end to the evening.”

Dan has been with Stacey for three years now but she has changed a lot since he met her at university. It all goes wrong at new years even when they get into another fight and Dan decides to spend the night with his friends instead of with her. After the nearly fifty messages she left him that night alone, he decides to put an end to it. But things don’t really go as planned and instead of breaking up kind of ‘peacefully’ he gets kicked out of the house by Stacey best friend Sophie who wants to kill him with a baseball bat. From that point on things change, but not for the better. Time and again Dan gets himself into the must stupid and surreal situations, even his friends are unable to help him break the drought and as it goes on Dan is getting more desperate. Rob, Ollie and Jack try to help him as best as they can but even their knowledge combined can’t save Dan from making a complete fool of himself. He even manages to get on the television twice! (not under the best circumstances but heej there is no such thing as bad publicity right?)

So yes I did read the sequel first but that doesn’t matter because this book is just as awesome, funny and amusing ^_^ Why you ask? Well here is why:

This book is everything I hoped it would be. There are the familiar yet unimaginable situations he is able to get into. He does it all on his own and I have to say that is very impressive. I’ve got more than one favourite scene is this book but I think that this one is the one I loved the most:

“‘I bumped into Simon Peterson yesterday.’ Rob said. ‘He lives on Mantilla Road.’
‘So what?’ I sneered.
‘He happened to mention that he saw you on his road on Wednesday night,’ Rob announced. ‘He was working on his car. He would have said hello, but you sprinted past him at a ferocious pace with a dog chasing you.’
‘Was it a poodle?’ Ollie questioned.
‘No it wasn’t a poodle,’ I said. ‘It was a big horrible, snarling beast.’
‘Simon said it was a sausage dog.’ Rob said and they all started laughing again.

This is a scene where Dan is having a drink with his friends and yes they’re making fun of him again. Now what happened before this is quite hilarious because it has to do with a date that would have stopped Dan’s drought. Dan got a second chance with Grace and just as they were going to take it one step further, he discovers that he doesn’t have any condoms with him. Getting dressed to get some at a store nearby, he runs out of Grace’s house but by the time he has to get back he finds out that he has no idea how to get back at all. That is when, after walking some time, he encounters a big horrible snarling beast… that turned out to be a sausage dog.

This book was so much fun to read and even though I read the second book first it didn’t affect me at all because everything that happened was just as unexpected. The amazing characters combined with the easy use of language, the everyday scenes and hilarious situations made for a great book. Again this book brings the whole dating-scenario from a totally different perspective. Not from the female point of view but from a man’s and that makes it all the more fun to read. It is that I am a woman myself but by reading this I understand that most man don’t understand women at all, sometimes even I don’t understand women (or myself for that matter) at all. Some of the language and scenes might be a little too harsh or descriptive for some people but that just made it better in my opinion.

Overall I think the book was great and it was so much fun to read. I would recommend this book to everyone who loves romance/comedy/chicklit kind of novels. I give this book four stars because me really likey.

Lad Lit Book Review: Ugly Americans by Ben Mezrich

If you want the quick review then imagine Wolf of Wall Street in Asia with more edge. If that has tantalized your taste buds then read on.

I first read Ugly Americans about 10 years ago when it first came out. I’d just discovered Ben Mezrich through Bringing Down The House and Busting Vegas, and had become a big fan. This book, whilst perhaps not one of Mezrich’s most well-known books, is one of my favourites.

In 1993 John Malcolm throws himself into the crazy world of stockbroking in Japan. He receives a baptism of fire as the first company he works for loses hundreds of millions in a deal set-up by one of the directors, forcing him out of a job. It's not long before he ends up at Barings Bank, working for infamous rogue trader Nick Leeson who made a $2bn gamble that sent Barings into receivership and Malcolm back to the job centre.

Malcolm ends up working back with the man who brought him to Asia in the first place, Dean Carney, and that is where the fun, fortune and fame start. Malcolm soon starts to rise up the financial ladder, making deals and trades that propel him to become a star in his own right to his fellow expat western traders, before being responsible for what was called "biggest deal in the history of the financial markets."

Millions are made, and then even more millions are made, but for me the real appeal in this book comes from the backdrop of the weird and wonderful fish bowl that is Tokyo. From the downright bizarre back-alley sex clubs and fetishes of local rich businessman, to the sinister side of Japan’s underbelly, namely the Yakuza.

Like all Mezrich books there is a love interest, the daughter of a Japanese mob boss, and through this relationship Malcolm find himself rubbing shoulders with men more cut-throat than those he works alongside on the trading floor.

It's an incredible journey and Mezrich excels once again in telling the story and bringing to life a world crafted from greed, power and unimaginable wealth, held together by danger and risk at every corner.

As the title says, this really is the true story of the Ivy League cowboys who raided the Asian markets for millions.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Seeing Other People by Mike Gayle

Mike Gayle is the reason I first ever got into lad lit and after reading this book about infidelity and friendship, tinged with heartbreak and sorrow with a touch of A Christmas Carol thrown into it, I soon remembered why.

When Joe Clarke wakes up with the hot office intern, panic sets in. He does the classic man thing – claiming he can’t remember what happened, but as some of us have learned the hard way, that rarely gets us out of trouble.

It’s not long before his wife Penny rumbles him and takes off with the kids. Joe vows to be a better man to win his family back, and help is going to come from the most unlikely of places, namely his recently deceased girlfriend. Yep, you read that right! Joe has his very own ghost of relationship past. It sounds strange, but it works.

As a reader you buy into what Joe is going through – the disappointment in himself, the regret of what he is has lost, the determination to get his family back. What Gayle does with his male lead characters is make them real. You feel the emotion as though you’re one of Joe’s mates that he is confiding in.

The real stars of the book are perhaps the other members of the Divorced Dads' Club, who rally around each other as they share their tales of woe. Men don’t share their true feelings at the best of times, but Gayle deals with this brilliantly as he intertwines their stories into the novel.

All in all, Gayle proves again why he is one of the best at writing about normal male blokes, and he does it in a style that makes you want to know ‘what happened next’ long after the final page has been turned.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Dinner For Two by Mike Gayle

I have to be honest from the off and admit that I read this book quite some time ago. At first glance of the cover I couldn’t quite remember what the book was about but after a quick glance over the blurb I remembered the book fondly (Stop Press! Book blurb explains what the story is about!).

So here is the gist of the story – Dave Harding is a serious music journalist and we all know a bloke like Dave. They bang on about the most obscure bands you’ve never heard of and insist that if you don’t like the “indy” scene then you are not very cool. Not too dissimilar from the Rob Fleming character from Nick Hornby’s High Fidelity.

But when Dave finds himself out of a job after the music magazine he is working for folds, he is forced to make ends meet by writing articles for a women’s magazine edited by his wife Izzy, and before long he lands the role of Agony Uncle for a Teen Scene; a publication for boy-band loving girls. The problem is, Dave actually starts to enjoy dishing our advice to teenage girls and before long he is offering up his ‘expertise’ to anyone who will listen!

Then out of the blue, Dave gets a letter from a 13-year-old girl claiming that he is her father and his world is thrown into chaos somewhat, especially seeing as Izzy has recently suffered a miscarriage. The prospect of fatherhood had left Dave longing to have a child of his own, but now he finds himself in the unenviable position of being torn between the revelation that he could be father for a teenage girl he hardly knows and how to approach the woman he loves to tell her he has fathered a child from a previous relationship within weeks of them losing their own baby.

It’s an interesting subject matter to tackle from a ‘blokes’ point of view and as I’ve always found with Mike Gayle books, he does it with a really nice approach and tone. It never came across as trying to take itself too seriously although it always kept in line with the fact it was dealing with a serious issue, and it is helped along with comical dithering that a man would certainly be able to relate to, and probably a lot of women would recognise too!

This is Mike Gayle doing what he does best, and wrapping a very clever story in comfortable surroundings (the back story of Dave being a magazine journalistic mirrors Gayle’s own profession), so it is very easy to believe the character and the life in which he is living. What probably wasn’t as easy was tackling the issue of building a relationship with someone you hardly know while at the same time trying not to hurt the one closest to you.

All in all, it’s another notch on the lad lit post for Gayle, and fans of his of this style of genre will lap it up. It might not be to every lads taste but what is? If you haven’t tried Mike Gayle before then this is not a bad place to start!

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Casino: Love & Honor in Las Vegas by Nicholas Pileggi

Anyone who has seen the Martin Scorsese film Casino will clearly remember the scene where Joe Pesci’s character pops the guys eye out of its socket whilst squeezing his head in a vice. It’s fair to say it’s wasn't a pretty sight (pardon the pun), but if you are a die-hard mob movie fan then it’s a scene that is right up there with a horse’s head in a bed or asking if I’m funny like a clown.

Well if you were a fan of the film (or even better, if you haven’t seen the film yet), then make sure you check out this book! Brought to us by Nicholas Pileggi, the same author who penned Wiseguy which was the inspiration for Goodfellas, this is the story of Love and Honor in Las Vegas.

Pileggi focuses in on two prominent mob figures who went to Las Vegas in the 1970s with the instructions from the Chicago Outfit to run the gambling capital of the world with a combination of brains and brawn. Frank “Lefty” Rosenthal, who  was one of Chicago’s top sports handicappers, was sent by mob bosses to run the casinos and skim millions of dollars from the profits to line their pockets in the process, while Tony “The Ant” Spilotro was the street thug and mafia hitman sent in to take care of any unsavoury business!

What follows is a story full of lust, greed, violence and more violence as Pilleggi delivers a knock-out blow-by-blow account of what Vegas was like during the mob’s heyday stranglehold of sin city; but perhaps most importantly of all it tells of the fall of the mafia’s grip on Las Vegas. A lot of the story is told through the words of Rosenthal and his own downfall, which starts to unravel when he falls into legal problems over his lack of a gaming licence due to his criminal record, his Showgirl wife’s addiction to everything that is wrong in her life, and last but not least the increasingly erratic and violent behaviour of Spilitro. 

It also flags up just how much of a crazy town Vegas was during that period. For example, Rosenthal’s answer to not being given a gaming licence was to star in his own TV chat show to combat those who had rejected his application. Read that again. That's right – he decided to host his own TV chat show because someone told him no! It’s basically the same as not being successful in a job interview so you decide to go onto Jeremy Kyle to air your grievances!

And things don’t get any better for poor Frank as his showgirl wife, Geri, spirals out of control on drink and drugs and then does the one thing that would be bloody hard for any lad to deal with – she shacks up with the local hitman and has an affair with Spilotro, who by now is playing by his own rules and is heading up the notorious Hole in the Wall gang who would break into places by, well, smashing a hole through the wall!

Evil doesn’t even do the word justice in trying to explain the type of man Spilitro was, but even for all his crimes you still can’t quite believe the shocking and gruesome demise he is met with, which probably says as much about dispelling the so-called romance around the mafia created by stories such as The Godfather that I was still unable comprehend the awful way in which these gangsters deal with their own.

My only criticism of the book – and it has to be said that it is a minor criticism – is that it doesn’t read as smoothly at times as Wiseguy did. Pileggi has done his research, no doubt about it, but there were times when trying to keep up with the narrative that had been pieced together by old interviews or FBI files wasn’t easy to follow.

But all in all, if you like your gangster stories, then you will like Casino. It harks back to an age where Vegas was not the adult theme park it has become today. "Today in Las Vegas, the men in fedoras who built the city are gone," Pileggi concludes, and whilst that is true, it still remains that one of the wealthiest cities in the world was built on the blood money by American gangsters.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Charlotte Street by Danny Wallace

When I grow up and (hopefully) become a proper writer, I want to be Danny Wallace. His words simply trickle off the page like treacle oozing off a spoon, and in Charlotte Street he has a real winner on his hands. Here was have the story of Jason Priestley (not of 90210 fame although he gets that a lot...) whose brief encounter with a mystery beauty on Charlotte Street results in him being left with her disposal camera.

Besotted by the mystery woman and encouraged by his best friend Dev (who is arguably the best character in the book), Jason decides to get the pictures developed to try and use it for clues to find her again. With shades of Friends Like These, Jason ends up searching the length and breadth of the country (well, Whitby anyway) in what becomes a slight obsession to meet this woman again.

Along the way he meets old and new friends (Matt – the kid he used to teach, his ex Sarah and her fiancé Gary, his work colleague Clem the wannabe stand-up comedian, Abbey the free spirit); all have their own rich identities and personalities that Wallace captures so brilliantly well, and weaves them into Jason's life in a way which makes each character seem equally as important to the story, no matter how much or how little they actually appear in the book.

In a way, they all play their part in Jason trying to find this woman which inadvertently means he ends up finding himself. There are plenty of laughs along the way, and the dialogue between the characters at times is nothing short of brilliant, yet so simple. The story is told to us by Jason, which means you get closer to the character as you share his inner-most thoughts, no matter how quirky or silly they are.

One of the greatest triumphs in this book is that even though Jason is going through a tough time in his life (his career is going nowhere fast) he never becomes whiny, and instead as the reader you urge him on in his journey like he is an old friend.

There are lots of funny moments in this book that range from Jason becoming the poster boy for the local pizza restaurant's marketing drive to turning up at his ex's engagement party and being part of a plan that gets all of the guests high on marijuana; Wallace describes them all in that all-so-easy style that makes it feel like the man is sitting next to you in a pub telling you the story himself.

Just in case I haven't made this clear already - this is a really enjoyable book which I highly recommend. If you are looking for a new lad lit book to read, then look no further...!

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Trust Me by Jeff Abbott

If I could sum up all of Jeff Abbott’s main characters from his catalogue of excellent thrillers in one word it would be unlucky. If I could use two words it would be bloody unlucky!

But if I take that same formula, flip it around and point it at the reader of Jeff Abbott books, then that word would be lucky; because we are bloody lucky that Jeff Abbott continues to share his gift of being able to write edge-of-your-seat stuff time and time again.

Luke Dantry takes centre stage this time as our unlucky hero; caught up in the world of extreme terrorism that will jolt him from his pretty normal life as a 24-year-old university graduate working with his stepfather to conduct research into extremists groups on the Internet. In typical Abbott fashion, the story doesn’t take long to delve straight into the action. The scene is set at the start with the usual suspects of shady characters plotting unforgiving atrocities on an unsuspecting world as a man in a grey suit is the happy recipient of $50m from a wealthy Middle Eastern prince to finance what we become to know as Hellfire. However, what our two bad guys are unaware of is that their little conversation is being listened in to by a British woman called Jane, who is the catalyst for dragging poor Luke into this mess.

Luke’s stepfather – Henry Shawcross; a man who stepped into Luke’s father’s shoes when his real dad was killed by terrorists, and continued to pick up the pieces after his mother died in a car crash – is an expert on predicting how and when terrorist groups will attack. After delivering Henry his latest findings from the online terrorist groups he has infiltrated known as The Night Road, Luke drives Henry to the airport and it is here that his world is about to fall apart.

Upon dropping Henry off, Luke is kidnapped at gunpoint by a desperate man he knows only as Eric. In a haze of fear, panic, and confusion, Luke finds himself an accomplice in the seemingly pointless murder of a homeless man, a bargaining chip for Eric’s own kidnapped girlfriend, and eventually chained to a bed in a cabin in the middle of nowhere. Now Luke needs to find a way to escape before the people sent to collect him get there.

What follows is an epic journey across America as Luke tries to piece together the puzzles of his own life to make sense of the madness that has engulfed him, and to work out if he can really trust anyone. Sandwiched in the middle of all the chaos in Luke’s life is the backdrop of random acts of violence as the group funding Hellfire set about using their web of extremists to plot attacks across the country.

Abbott has once again put together an ensemble of characters, dialogue, and plots that screech around corners at a 100mph before taking unexpected turns and near crash experiences. My four and five star rating for Abbott’s material might be getting a reputation for being quite repetitive, but every single one of his books has been a winner for me. Some better than others, definitely, and if I’m being really harsh then maybe compared this one to his other books like Panic and Fear, I might knock the odd star off this one, but I’m not being harsh, this is another bloody good read, and that’s that!

Trust me, this book is good!

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Banged Up Abroad: Hellhole by James Miles & Paul Loseby

I've learnt a thing or two since reading the odd book about how you might want to try and avoid the perils and pitfalls of finding yourself behind bars in a foreign nick. For example, that dodgy bloke you met in the pub who offers you easy money for going on a simple little trip is dodgy for a very good reason. Another little tidbit is smuggling drugs out of an Asian or South American country is generally a pretty piss-poor decision, especially when all you get is a weeks holiday at a 5-star hotel and about five grand for your troubles. Stick with your 3-star hotel with Thomas Cook, paid with from your own hard earned money; it's less hassle, trust me. 

Oh, and if you've got nothing but clouds between your ears and you opt to take the dodgy bloke up on his offer of luxury in return of doing a little 'favour' for him, run a million miles if he says the job involves traveling to Venezuela!

Franks Kane's In The Shadow Of Papillon sent a shiver down my spine when I read it, and James Miles and Paul Loseby's account of their Fight To Survive South America's Deadliest Prison comes a very close second!

I remember seeing these two lads on the TV show Banged Up Abroad and it was one of my favourite episodes. Here you had two normal guys who naively agreed to smuggle cocaine back into the UK after growing 'bored' of their lives in Leicester, and my God they paid the price for that boredom!

I've said it before in my reviews of these types of books and I'll say it again - I don't applaud anyone for attempting to smuggle or deal in drugs, but I do applaud the testicular fortitude these people put on display when faced with sadistic prison guards, vicious gangs armed to the teeth with knives, guns, and grenades, and not to mention the filth, insects, and rat infested conditions they have to live in. Miles and Loseby had to deal with some of the worst conditions and scenarios I've read about.

My only criticism - and it is a minor criticism - is that at times I did find myself thinking that Uri Geller would have been proud of the levels of truth 'bending' going on in here! Some of the stories seem a little far fetched. James Miles takes control as the lead vocal in this book, and he clearly enjoys playing the tough guy, which I appreciate you have to do in a situation as extreme as this. But there is a bit too much bravado for me at times; too much of Miles making sure he lets the reader know how much of a 'geezer' he is. You're in a awful, horrible, vile situation - we get it. We know how tough you have to be, you don't need to keep reminding the reader!

Then again, maybe I'm being too harsh, and perhaps after you have been through what these two guys went through you're entitled to some creative freedom and dare I say it, boasting. After all is said and done, the sad reality of this book is that it's a very tragic story of a lost youth. It never ceases to amaze me just how shocking some of these experiences can be; sometimes words simply don't do them justice. 

The bond between these two kids - because that's what they were at 19 when this happened - is testament to the inhumane conditions and regime they fought against to live to tell the tale. I'm sure people would be quick to label and stereotype Miles and Loseby as two typical council estate wannabe gangsters; but I think that upbringing probably saved their lives. Christ knows you need to show a bit of streetwise savvy and aggression to survive a place like Yare (the prison in which they were housed).

I found myself engrossed within the pages of this story, and I came to quite like the two boys, and I was willing them to make it through this terrible journey. Everyone makes mistakes, and these two made the Godzilla of all mistakes. But they fought with every ounce of strength and soul left in their bodies, and that comes through in their words.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: I Am The Secret Footballer

Football has never been bigger – in terms of both finances and global status. Players are like rock stars from your Ozzy Osbourne’s (Luis Suarez – likes to bite things) to your Bono’s (David Beckham – does a lot for charity y’know) and your Donny Tourette’s (John Terry – no one likes him) to your Liam Gallagher’s (Joey Barton – talks a good game and likes a punch-up).

If the football field is a theatre then the media tales we hear is the pantomime and we’ve become as hungry for all the on-field antics as we have with those off-field. The almost 24-hour coverage of the beautiful game makes us feel like we have almost open access to the inner-goings on at our clubs, but the truth is the truth is there has never been such a wider divide between players and fans as there is today.

That is what makes I Am The Secret Footballer so intriguing. Even before this book came out, this mystery player has been revealing top secret information about the inner sanctum of the Premier League and the lives that revolve around it in his column for The Guardian. Most footballer’s autobiographies are rarely that open, maintaining that What happens in the dressing room, stays in the dressing room stance, especially if they are still playing.

But in this book, the Secret Footballer is more than happy to hold the door wide open and let us walk in to explore all manners of everything football from managers to players and the media to money. He talks candidly about players contracts and what the atmosphere in the dressing room is really like.

And then there is the bad behaviour. For every scandal that makes it on to the front pages of the tabloids, there appears to be double the amount we never hear about. His stories about one footballer’s wife and another married player openly getting jiggy in a Dubai swimming pool or the time the his team had an interesting altercation with a bunch of Barcelona players at a Las Vegas strip club make for more than just an interesting read!

Still, I couldn’t help but think as I read the book that he was always being totally open.  For example, the player is clearly married or has had a long-term partner, so when he regales stories about wannabe WAGs throwing themselves at footballers (one great story is when a girl is ashamed of herself for going back to sleep with a Championship player!), he is always quick to distance himself from any wrong-doing despite the fact some of his stories involve him going back to hotels with these women.

For the most part he is honest and open, and discussion around his identity continues to grow. A recent website set-up by fans of the column believe they have ‘unmasked’ the player to be current Sheffield United striker Dave Kitson after matching certain criteria within the book to the former Stoke City and Reading player.

Whoever he is, he has written a must-read book for all football fans who want to know what really goes on in the world of a top-level professional footballer.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: The Devil's Graveyard by Anonymous (The Bourbon Kid 3)

Have you ever wondered what would happen if X Factor met Night of the Living Dead? Me neither, but I’m sure as hell pleased that the anonymous author of The Devil’s Graveyard chose to mash these two unlikely forces together!

The third in the Bourbon Kid series (following The Book With No Name and The Eye of the Moon) takes a detour away from the vampire and werewolf infested city of Santa Mondega, and instead we are plonked bang in the middle of the Arizona desert at the Hotel Pasadena, which seems to be the holiday destination of choice for the undead as well as every lowlife and murderer in the country! Throw in an army of flesh-eating zombies and you have a whole different meaning to the term self-catering!

The reason for this gathering of ghouls is to take part in a TV talent show called ‘Back From the Dead’ but unbeknown to them is the fact chief judge Nigel Powell (And yes, Nigel Powell is a parody of Simon Cowell from the bright white smile to the devil horns!) has rigged the contest and has hired a stone cold hitman to bump off the other contestants as an insurance policy.

Queue the appearance of everyone’s favourite mass murderer, The Bourbon Kid, to sweep in and throw a spanner in the works, especially when he takes it upon himself to make sure no harm comes to one of the contestants, Emily, who reminds him of someone he knew a lifetime ago before the bourbon transformed him into a raging killer.

But The Kid is not the only one to make a return to form as the hapless bartender Sanchez once again steals the show with some seriously laugh-out loud scenarios after turning up at the hotel after winning a competition to earn himself a weekend away. Only Sanchez could win something and end up in Hell!

What else can I say about this writer and this series of books that I haven't said in my previous two reviews? He/she has the uncanny ability to articulate the most gruesome of scenes yet they still leave you with a smile on your face. It is laced with wicked dark humour throughout which means the laughs come as thick and fast as the blood that scatters each page.

It’s simply another great triumph from the author, and it just as hard to put down as the previous two. If I'm being ultra critical it's not quite as good as the first two instalments, but they set the bar so high that it's by no means a criticism on what is a fantastically enjoyable read!

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Be Careful What You Wish For by Simon Jordan

If you have gone and watched your football team play against Crystal Palace in the last decade, chances are you would have chanted “Simon Jordan is a w*nker” alongside 10,000 or so of your fellow fans at the top of your lungs.

Perhaps this is not the best endorsement for Simon Jordan and his book, but how many other football chairman can you think of that was more controversial, more outspoken, and more blonde than the former Eagles owner?

Palace fans loved him, opposition fans loved to taunt him. The perma-tanned self-made millionaire made his fortune in the mobile phone business and by the age of 32 he was the youngest owner of a football club. Ten years and £35m later he had lost it all, but what a decade he had left in his wake.

You might not think that Jordan has much more to say in this book that he hasn’t already aired publicly such was his inability to keep his mouth shut in front of reporters or a TV camera, but that certainly isn’t the case.

What is refreshing about this book compared to other football autobiographies is that we get a different perspective on the crazy world of top-flight football. Never one to be a shrinking violet, Jordan is unrelenting with his attacks on players, managers, agents, and other chairman (he once said: “If I see another David Gold interview on the poor East End Jewish boy done good I'll impale myself on one of his dildos).

I applaud his tenaciousness to try and turn his beloved Crystal Palace into a top flight contender, but at the same time I can’t help but shake my head at his insistence to continue to throw millions of pounds at something without considering the consequences. It is a bit like lending cash to your best mate who you know is rubbish with money; you know you’ll never get the money back but you keep trying to help out. Another classic case of an accomplished businessman leaving his business acumen at the turnstiles.

Jordan is certainly lives up to the hype of a big-time Charlie as he talks about his Spanish villas and private jets, but so what? He earned the right to live that lifestyle, and how many more football chairman do you know who dated supermodels? Whatever your opinion of him, his time in football certainly made things interesting.

He battled relentless against the system, creating enemies in every corner of the football family from senior members of the FA to Millwall and Birmingham fans and to fellow chairman (former Charlton chairman Richard Murray challenged him to a fight) and the managers he hired and fired (eight managers would come and go during his tenure). That is not to say that Jordan did not have his supporters and friends in football, but he wasn't afraid of who upset along the way.

In amongst all the bravado and the self-gratification is a very insightful look at the parts of football we as fans don’t normally get exposed to, and after reading this book I truly believe Jordan wanted to make a difference in football and fought a good fight. Unfortunately for him it wasn’t good enough and not only did he lose a fortune, but football in general is probably a lot poorer for the loss of another great character.

As a football fan, I found this a really enjoyable read. Football is a bit like a pantomime or a soap opera and the roles of those characters are played out beautifully in this book. We have the implosion of ITV Digital, the Iain Dowie court case for fraudulent misrepresentation (when Jordan issued Dowie a writ during his press conference as he was being unveiled as the new Charlton manager), and of course the bitter downfall that nearly dragged Palace into the football graveyard of obscurity. Unfortunately for Jordan it was his lone tombstone that was consigned to football folklore.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Adrenaline by Jeff Abbott

In typical Jeff Abbott form this one not only packs a punch from the opening pages, but it explodes open an almighty 'I'm gonna knock you the f*** out' can of whoop-ass!

Sam Capra's perfect existence in London is about to come crashing down all around him. The American CIA Agent is closing in on an important target when his pregnant wife calls him at work urging him to get out of the building. Within minutes Sam's life is in tatters and everything he holds close is gone. As he steps out on to the street he spots his wife, Lucy, being driven away by a mysterious scar-faced man. Before Sam can give chase he is knocked out from the blow of a bomb ripping through his office.

When Sam awakes he is in a prison cell, told that he is the only survivor from the explosion, and is tortured for information to find out why he has murdered all of his colleagues and why he has turned traitor.Sam needs to act fast and fall back on all of the skills he learned as a CIA Operative if he is to survive and discover the truth about the life he thought he knew so well.

Abbott is fast becoming the king of the thriller genre, and with Adrenaline he has created a character that will become the basis of a series of books, much like Robert Ludlum did with the Bourne character. What that means is that Abbott moves away from the normal everyday 'Joe Bloggs' character from his previous novels, and has created a man more adept to arm-to-arm combat.

The cynic inside me says he has done this with one eye on a movie deal, but it doesn't change the fact that Abbott is very good at what he does, and maybe I'm simply being too hasrh. After all, it's also fair to say that Abbott has shown he is able to turn his hand at being able to write about a different type of character rather than sticking to the tried and tested format which has already worked so well for him.

Abbott effortlessly holds the readers attention with more twists and turns that a Formula One racing track. His books are always cool, slick, and are packed with so much energy that they should come with a health warning. Adrenaline lives up to its name, but be prepared that once you reach the ending there is a strong chance you'll be hooked on the Sam Capra series and will find yourself lining Mr Abbott's pockets with more of your cash to buy the next installment.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Different Seasons by Stephen King

First things first, let's get this out in the open now. This is a Stephen King book, but it is not a horror story. It's not even one non-horror story, it's actually a collection of four novellas. Two of these novellas spawned two of the greatest films ever made; and on this occasion the films are actually better than the book, even though I really enjoyed the book, or novellas, or whatever they're called!

Confused yet? Okay, let me start again.

I'd never read a Stephen King book before; horror novels have never really appealed to me. But a good few years ago Channel 4 were showing one of my favourite films Stand By Me. I sat down to watch and as the credits rolled this appeared on screen: Based on the book The Body by Stephen King.

'But this isn't a horror film!' I thought to myself. Perhaps I hadn't read the words on the screen correctly, and back then I didn't have the luxury of Sky+ to rewind and check, but I did have this little thing called Google! A quick internet search later and I found out that not only had my eyes not deceived me, but this novel was also responsible for the making of The Shawshank Redemption as well. 'This must be the God of all books' I decided and rushed out the next day to buy myself a copy of this marvelous hybrid of magical words that had somehow managed to inspire not one, but two brilliant films!

And it was as I flicked through the pages in Waterstones that I realised this was a collection of four novellas, rather than one super-story about four boys who go in search of a dead body, do battle against an older gang, find said body, and then all grow-up before presumably one of those boys (probably Gordy) is found guilty of murdering his wife and her lover in his adult life, is wrongly sent to prison, and plots one of the most fantastically jaw-dropping moments in movie history!

Well it could have happened that way!

Instead King has delivered four wonderfully written stories - The Body (Stand By Me), Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption (The Shawshank Redemption), Apt Pupil (which was also made into a film in 1998 of the same name), and The Breathing Method.

The two former stories have become well-known in their own right thanks to their film adaptations, and there will be those who are familiar with Apt Pupil, although I have not seen the film myself so I am not entirely sure how closely it sticks to King's tale of the entwined lives of a 16-year-old boy and his elderly Nazi war criminal neighbor, who both set about their own grisly murders of the homeless before a final twist brings them back together.

The fourth novella, The Breathing Method, is about a middle-aged Manhattan lawyer who joins an exclusive men's club where, amongst other things, like to share unusual stories about their lives. It is here that David the lawyer meets  Dr. Emlyn McCarron who tells him of a rather gruesome story that becomes the subtext to the novella.

I won't go into too much more detail as I don't want to give everything away, but what I will say is that the biggest compliment I can pay to Stephen King and Different Seasons is that through reading this book I now want to pick up another Stephen King novel, despite the fact I'm not a fan of horror, such was his ability to paint stories with words. Even though I still prefer the two movie versions of his film, I don't think that is a sleight on King's work here because this collection of novellas still remain hugely enjoyable and you have to remember it was King's imagination that inspired those brilliant stories to be brought to life on the big screen. That deserves your reading attention.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: The Damage Done by Warren Fellows

The opening few sentences of this book grab hold of you in a vice like grip and attempts to prepare the reader for what is to come. 'Think about the most wretched day of your life' the author asks the reader to contemplate, 'and then imagine 4,000 of those days together in one chunk.'

Australian drug-smuggler Warren Fellows doesn't pull any punches, nor does he ask for your sympathy. But he wants his story to be told, because reading what this man went through - no matter what his crime - leaps at you off the pages like a Thai prison warden bashing you across the head with a bamboo stick.

It's powerful stuff; frightening and unthinkable to imagine that right now - somewhere in the world at this very minute - another human being is suffering the way Fellows suffered for 12 years.

After operating as a cocaine smuggler, an introduction to infamous gangster Neddy Smith leads to Fellows pairing up with Smiths brother-in-law Paul Hayward and sending them to Thailand to smuggle heroin into Australia. 

What Fellows and Hayward didn't realise is that they were already under surveillance before they even left the country, and their world was about to fall apart. Following their arrest and conviction in 1978, the pair are shipped around Thailand's most notorious prisons. Here they suffer such inhumane conditions that will go on to have long lasting effects.

Despite reaching into an intense darkness to tell his tale, Fellows still manages to maintain an engaged tone throughout, and at times can be very amusing. The story about how much inmates have to pay to have sex with a good looking pig (yes, you read that correctly) is delivered with such dry sarcasm that you can't help but smile at the absurdity of the horrible situation he is in.

I've read a few books in this genre and this one is right up there with my favourite In the Shadow of Papillon. Perhaps not the sort of book you want to read on a flight to Bangkok, but then again it will certainly make you think twice about what you get up to at those Full Moon parties!

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Friends Like These by Danny Wallace

When I grow up, I want to be like Danny Wallace! Because here is a man who has carved out a career for himself still doing all the things you might drunkenly discuss and laugh about whilst in the pub, but would then never actually do when you came to your senses the morning after.

But take a look at Danny Wallace’s back-catalogue of books and you see that not only is he the man that still carries out these immature boy tasks, but he has wrote a whole bunch of books on them. I guess we shouldn’t be surprised, he is the Yes Man after all...

But that is another book! Today I am here to review Friends Like These. This was my first Danny Wallace book, and therefore the one that got me hooked on this brilliant genius! Something hit a chord with me when I read the synopsis for this book, because long before the days of Facebook, I too often wondered what those tiny people who I used to share a classroom with were up to these days. Granted they probably weren’t tiny anymore, but surely something else must have happened to them apart from growth!

And that is the concept of Danny’s book. He finds an address book with the names of his childhood friends from yesteryear. And then comes the idea – the classic Wallace idea! Why don’t I try to track these guys down?!

Of course, it is the sort of nonsense that any normal run-of-the-mill-nine-to-five-guy can only daydream about, but Danny has a bit of time on his hands so he goes on the hunt. And it is a hunt that takes him from London to Berlin, Tokyo, Australia, and California! Quite an epic journey you might say. Once Facebook did explode on to our laptops (steady!), I actually picked out eight friends myself from Primary School. My journey would have taken me to Tooting.

Luckily Danny’s journey is a bit more exotic and fun-packed than that, and although you find yourself wondering where this is all going to end up, you do get lost and caught up in it all as Danny’s friends turn out to be rappers and ninjas, time-travelling pioneers, mediocre restaurant managers, and even Fijian royalty!

Perhaps not Danny’s best book, but when you have written some of the gems that this man has, that probably isn’t very surprising. But I thoroughly enjoyed it, and can safely say I would recommend this to anyone – no matter what your taste – if you are just up for some good old fashioned reading fun!

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Run by Jeff Abbott

A few years ago I turned up at the airport ready to jet off to Egypt on holiday with the feeling I’d forgotten something. I racked my brains. Had I locked the door? Check. Had I packed my lucky Speedo's? Check. Had I brought along a damn fine book for the beach? Bollocks.

With my flight being called to the gate, I rushed off the WHSmith to grab myself a book. Hot and flustered, I darted past the latest array of D-list celebrity autobiographies they were trying to flog to holidaymakers and locked eyes on one book on the ‘New Releases’ stand. I made my choice based on the fact I myself was in a rush, and picked up the appropriately named Run. I’d not heard of the author before but the fact it was being hailed on the front cover as a ‘Bourne Identity for the 21st Century’ was good enough for me.

Two days into the holiday I realised what an awful mistake I had made picking up this book.

I should have picked up two Jeff Abbott books! I was tearing through the book as quickly as the main character, Ben Fosberg, was tearing up the pages in his attempts to escape the team of Homeland Security Agents who believed he had something to do with an apparent hit on a businessman who happened to be carrying Ben’s business card in his pocket.

My plans of lying in the sun or splashing around in the pool were slowly overtaken by my need to find out the answers to the questions Abbott throws up. Why was Ben was being hounded by these agents? Who is this mysterious stranger known as Pilgrim who has come to Ben’s aid? Does this have anything to do with the murder of his wife whilst on their Honeymoon two years earlier? Has anyone seen my Speedo's?

So much energy goes into this book from the get-go that you even start to feel the strain yourself such is the pace of the action that explodes with each turn of the page. You are left to keep guessing the reasons behind the scenario the main character finds himself in, with twists and turns along the way that keep you asking wondering all the way through who the bad guys really are in this story.

The comparisons to The Bourne Identity are justified, but Abbott is his own man with his own style of writing. The everyday-man personality of his main protagonist allows you to easily slip into that imaginary role and place yourself at the heart of the thrill-ride that is unfolding. It’s a character pattern that Abbott has followed in the majority of his books that I have read since.

It is surely only a matter of time before this book – along with a whole host of Abbott’s back catalogue – start getting picked up by Hollywood movie producers. If you like your action fast-paced and heart-pounding, then you can do little wrong than grab yourself a copy of this book.

Lad Lit Book Reviews: My Legendary Girlfriend by Mike Gayle

I never would have found Mike Gayle had it not been for my flatmate insisting I read one of his books. I have to admit I wasn't too sure at first. The blurb read a bit too much like chick lit novel for my liking. I'm a man, and I like manly things dammit! Luckily I got past my silly male ego and embraced my metrosexuality, and a good few years later and I'm one of Mike Gayle's biggest fans.

My Legendary Girlfriend was Gayle's first novel, having spent time as a journalist and features writer. This book was a huge success as Gayle followed in the footsteps of fellow lad lit author Nick Hornby to write a book about relationships from a male perspective with very high praise indeed.

English teacher Will Kelly is single and pretty miserable to be honest! Set over one weekend, Will spends most of his time pining over his ex-girlfriend, Aggi, who cheated on him with his best pal. Then Kate enters Will's life in a series of phone calls which start to make Will feel like he has found someone to help him get over his ex.

Dubbed a male version of Bridget Jones Diary, Mike Gayle's first book gets a big thumbs up. I think whether we like to admit these things as men or not, we've all been there when we have pined over a girl a wee to much. We can't help ourselves, we know it's wrong and our friends are probably avoiding us because of it, but we've already gone too far.

That's Will in a nutshell. The guy we've all been and don't ever want to think about it. Like me, you'll probably want to grab Will at times, give him a slap, and tell him to snap out of it!

But Gayle writes in a way that makes you want to keep reading to see what happens, regardless of whether you like Will or not. Not that I disliked Will - as I said, we've all been there, and you end up rooting for Will.

This book will always hold a special place for me as this was my first real introduction to lad lit, and in a way, this was probably one of the biggest influences on me to pursue the idea of writing The Drought.

All in all, I would say that My Legendary Girlfriend is a great read, and once you've read this one you'll be searching for other books by Mike Gayle and trust me - you won't be disappointed!

Lad Lit Book Reviews: Fever Pitch by Nick Hornby

I can remember the exact moment I fell in love with football; and I mean really fell in love with football. I can still remember crying my eyes out as an 11-year-old boy having just seen my team Everton lose in the FA Cup Final to our bitter rivals (They play in red - I still can't even bring myself to utter their name...)

Those tears signified a love affair that still burns strong 24 years later. At that point I realised that life (and weekends in particular) would never be the same again. This football club had my heart, and despite the fact they would break it countless times over the years, I would always go back because, just like a drug addiction, the high you got from the good times were so good that you simply can't ever turn your back on them.

What Nick Horby has done in Fever Pitch is capture all of that emotion of the pain and joy that football brings, and put it down on the pages of a book and delivered it like a group of hardcore footy fans having a chat over a pint in the pub on a Saturday afternoon after the match.

You have got to be a lover of the beautiful game to truly appreciate and enjoy this book. Written in an autobiographical style, Hornby uses the backdrop of his obsession with Arsenal FC to recount his life story from an 8-year-old boy on the terraces with his father, right up until what was arguably the most exciting climax to a football season in 1989 when a last-gasp Michael Thomas goal snatched the championship title for the Gunners straight out under the noses from the team who's team name I can't say!

Everything that happens in Hornby's life - from his family to girlfriends to his education - revolves around football.Purists of the game will love this book, especially those who remember a time when money didn't rule with an iron fist, and the divide between players and fans was not as large as the astronomical sums of money they earn today.

But if you have little or no interest in football (or if you're a Spurs fan!), then you are probably best picking up another of Hornby's novels because this is going to be lost on you!