Saturday, 12 May 2012

Ramblings of a 30-something man... Mum, please stop breast feeding me!

I remember when I was about 18, a friend of mine told me that the small scar on his lip was from sucking on his mum's nipples too much when he was breastfed as a baby. Queue the fits of laughter and immature banter than you could only associate with a group of teenage boys.

So you can imagine the abundance of schoolboy thoughts that raced through my head when I nearly spat out my Weetabix upon seeing the cover of Time Magazine this week featuring a model-esque looking LA mom allowing her startled looking child suckle on her teet, all in the name of promoting breast feeding.

I'm no expert in the field, but surely there had to be a better way of promoting breast feeding rather than having a miniature David Walliams Little Britain character chow down on his mum's boob while mum does her best to pout at the camera with her come-to-bed eyes. The fact I'm jealous of the kid speaks volumes about the image! It's like looking at an image of Harry Styles from One Direction just hanging out with his latest conquest!

The mum in question is 26-year-old Jamie Lynn Grumet. Now I'm sure Ms Grumet only has the best intentions for her son, but surely she hasn't factored what impact this image is going to have on the poor boy in the long-term.

I think Susan Reinhardt said in best in her column on

This kid’s gonna enter preschool next year, and can’t you just hear the kids on the playground? “Hey, dude, is Mommy coming back during snack time?” And when this boy grows up, his legacy may be as the boob boy. From the photo, one would have expected him to have a nice piece of KFC in his free hand, something a little more solid to go with his mother’s milk.

Perhaps I am looking at this from the wrong way. After all, Ms Grumet makes some very valid points about breast milk being an unrivalled source of nutrition. With that in mind, I think I'm starting to come down with a fever. I think I might pop down to the airport and catch the first flight out to LA...

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